“To define yourself is to limit yourself. Without labels you remain the infinite being.” ~Deepak Chopra
Living with both ADHD and anxiety feels like trying to navigate life with your mind constantly racing in a thousand directions at once. It’s frustrating and exhausting, and, at times, it feels like success is out of reach.
But here’s the truth: success is possible. Even when it feels like your brain is working against you, with the right strategies and support, you can thrive.
As a nurse practitioner who has lived with undiagnosed ADHD and anxiety for much of my life, I’ve experienced the struggles that come with both. I’ve been labeled lazy, unteachable, and a lost cause.
But I’ve also learned how to break through those labels and find success on my own terms. It’s not easy, but it’s absolutely achievable.
The Early Years: ADHD and Anxiety in School
Growing up, ADHD wasn’t something people talked about. Kids who had trouble focusing were often written off as lazy or troublemakers. I was one of those kids, but I wasn’t the hyperactive type, so my struggles flew under the radar.
My teachers assumed I wasn’t trying hard enough, but the truth was, I was trying as hard as I could. If a subject didn’t grab my interest, my brain simply couldn’t focus.
The frustration of not being able to retain information or focus made school incredibly difficult. Teachers labeled me as lazy or unteachable, and those labels stuck. By the time I reached high school, I was so far behind that showing up to class felt pointless.
My grades were posted for everyone to see, and every time, I was at the bottom of the list. It felt like the world was constantly reminding me that I was a failure.
As my anxiety grew, I started skipping class regularly. Why show up just to feel like I was being judged? I was already seen as the kid who couldn’t keep up, and every time I walked into a classroom, it felt like a reminder of how far behind I was.
The anxiety of being judged, combined with my ADHD, made it impossible to succeed in that environment.
Hitting Rock Bottom
With no support system in place and a constant sense of failure hanging over me, I turned to unhealthy coping mechanisms. Drugs and alcohol became my escape from the pressure, anxiety, and feelings of inadequacy.
The constant emotional beatdown from teachers, peers, and my own inner voice was too much to bear.
I began to believe that I really was a lost cause. No one seemed to care about my potential, and I certainly didn’t see it myself. Eventually, I was kicked out of my public high school. At the time, it felt like the end of the road for me, but in reality, it was the best thing that could have happened.
Finding a New Path: The Alternative School
After being kicked out of public high school, I was sent to an alternative school, a place for the so-called “bad kids.” This school had a reputation for being where the rejects went—those who were expected to drop out, end up in jail, or get pregnant.
But what I didn’t expect was how this environment would change my life.
At the alternative school, the teachers didn’t care about my past failures. They didn’t look down on me for my low grades or judge me for being behind. Instead, they saw my potential. They worked with me one-on-one, offering me the chance to catch up and even get ahead. For the first time in my life, I felt like someone believed in me.
One teacher in particular recognized my talent for writing and encouraged me to join the school newsletter. I started taking on more responsibility and eventually became the editor. For the first time, I started to see myself as capable and smart.
College and Career: Finding Success Despite ADHD and Anxiety
After graduating from the alternative high school, I had a newfound sense of confidence. For the first time, I believed that college might be an option for me. I started at a community college and eventually transferred to a university, where I earned a bachelor’s degree in journalism and communication studies.
However, after working in journalism for a while, I realized that it wasn’t my true passion. I pivoted and went back to school to pursue a career in nursing. Earning my associate’s degree in nursing was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done, but it was also the most rewarding.
For seven years, I worked in the emergency department, where the fast-paced environment kept my ADHD in check and the constant reminder of life’s fragility put my anxiety in perspective.
Managing ADHD and Anxiety in Adulthood
While I had found success in my career, my ADHD and anxiety didn’t magically disappear. In fact, they became even more noticeable when I transitioned to working as a nurse practitioner.
The COVID-19 pandemic brought an intense level of pressure, and my anxiety skyrocketed. I found myself overthinking every decision, double- and triple-checking my work, and seeking reassurance from colleagues constantly.
It became clear that I needed to develop better strategies for managing both my ADHD and anxiety. Through a combination of medication, mindfulness practices, and a strong support system, I’ve been able to keep both in check.
What Works for Me: Strategies for Managing ADHD and Anxiety
Over the years, I’ve found that managing ADHD and anxiety requires a holistic approach. Medication has been a helpful tool, but it’s not the only answer. I’ve also incorporated practices like meditation, gratitude, and positivity into my daily routine, all of which help me manage my symptoms.
Meditation in particular has been a game-changer. It helps me calm my racing thoughts and stay grounded, especially when my anxiety starts to creep in. Practicing gratitude keeps me focused on the positive aspects of my life, which helps counter the negative self-talk that can sometimes accompany both ADHD and anxiety.
Positivity is another important tool in my toolbox. I’ve learned that staying positive isn’t about pretending everything is perfect—it’s about choosing to focus on what’s going well and using that as motivation to keep pushing forward.
The Importance of Believing in Yourself
Looking back, I realize that one of the biggest turning points in my life was learning to believe in myself. For so long, I had internalized the labels that others had placed on me. But once I started to see my own potential and believe that I was capable of success, everything changed.
ADHD and anxiety don’t define who you are or what you can achieve. Yes, they’re challenges, but they’re also part of what makes you unique.
With the right tools, strategies, and mindset, you can turn those challenges into strengths.
Final Thoughts: Success Is Possible—Keep Pushing Forward
ADHD and anxiety can feel like insurmountable obstacles at times, but they don’t have to hold you back. Success is possible, even if it feels out of reach right now.
You might feel like a lost cause, but you’re not. You’re capable of so much more than you realize.
It doesn’t matter where you started or what labels have been placed on you. What matters is that you keep pushing forward, believe in your potential, and surround yourself with people who support and uplift you.
Whatever struggles you’re facing, they are just part of your story—not the end of it.
Keep going. Success is well within your reach.
About Melissa McNamara
Melissa McNamara, the creator of Happy Easier, is dedicated to showing that happiness is attainable for everyone. Her blog shares practical, fact-based tips and techniques for leading a healthier and more fulfilling life. As a nurse practitioner, Melissa combines her healthcare expertise with clear, actionable advice. Despite early challenges, she turned difficulties into opportunities for growth, and through Happy Easier, she provides tools to help others achieve lasting happiness.
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